Chapter 1 “BILBO’S PANTRY”


Second Breakfast…?

Second Breakfast…?


Posted By on Aug 18, 2016

…just “Bilbo’s Special Ham and Eggs for Thorin” You might assume I eat a hearty breakfast, but I can’t handle food very early in the morning. When I was around 10 years old, I gave up drinking milk, but I don’t think I’m lactose-intolerant per se. When my daughters were in school, I bought into the “breakfast is the most important meal of the day” crap, so I generally provided them...

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Bryan Cranston’s Underwear…

Bryan Cranston’s Underwear…


Posted By on Aug 4, 2016

…and “Bag-End Biscuits” After a frenetic binge-watch of Breaking Bad (only my second viewing) and after seeing most of Malcolm in the Middle, I’m convinced that Bryan Cranston is the man I’ve seen most often in his underwear, with the exception of two other men. So—Cranston ranks number three. Of course, my husband is the number one wearer of underwear in front of me. Number two was my father. He...

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Crooked Cleopatra…

Crooked Cleopatra…


Posted By on Jul 20, 2016

…and “Gandalf’s Cold Chicken and Pickles” I just finished reading Stacy Schiff’s Cleopatra. It was okay; I gave it 3 stars on Goodreads, then put it in my book bag as a donation to wherever, since I don’t plan to read it again. My takeaway was this: 1. Politicians were incredibly corrupt. 2. The 1% ruled the world and didn’t give a shit about the remaining 99%. 3. A truly powerful woman will...

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Out of the Closet…

Out of the Closet…


Posted By on Jul 6, 2016

…and “Over the Hill and Across the Water Salad” Yes, I came out of my closet and concluded that I hate all of my clothes. ALL of them, every single item. Pretty much every item. Well, I guess I can live with a few pieces… I suppose this stems from a rather chronic dissatisfaction with my body in general. But perhaps this is how every woman feels? Nora Ephron felt bad about her neck and I can certainly...

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Doomsday Approacheth…

Doomsday Approacheth…


Posted By on Jun 5, 2016

…and “Bombur’s Pork-Pie” Recently, I had a dream/nightmare wherein our new president was named Donald Trump. For some reason, he was in bed, eating some meat loaf. Why meat loaf? I think somewhere along the line, I had heard a report that his son-in-law had wondered why his father-in-law would even want to be president because of all the work involved. He pictured dad usually sitting on the couch in the...

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Mom, Monty Python…

Mom, Monty Python…


Posted By on May 17, 2016

…and “Belladonna Took’s Lemon Cake” My mom occasionally liked to see films at our local art cinema, The Guild. One day she took us to see And Now For Something Completely Different, starring a band of relatively obscure Brits collectively known as Monty Python’s Flying Circus. I was ten and my sister was seven. It was 1972—why wasn’t she taking us to see some Disney film, like Napoleon and Samantha?...

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